2011 Was a Big Year For Polyamory, Polygamy

TIME Magazine, in reviewing 2011, had “Polygamy Tries to Go Mainstream” as #9 in their “Top 10 Marriage Stories.”

Belinda Luscombe wrote…

How far can the definition of marriage be stretched? That seemed like one of the Big Questions of 2011, as polygamy moved into the mainstream. Viewers were treated to a second season of Sister Wives, a reality show that centers around the family of Kody Brown, a Kato Kaelin lookalike with four wives and 17 children.

Polygamy is in no way stretching the definition of marriage. Polygamous marriages have been around all along.

Not only is the family living a wide-open polygamous lifestyle in Nevada, but its members are attempting to establish in federal court that they have a constitutional right to do so.

More power to them!

Meanwhile, the judicial system in Vancouver heard arguments for and against legalizing polygamy in a case designed to clarify the province's law. On one side, lawyers asked, If women choose to share a spouse, why should anybody else care? The other side's response: Because there's no polygamous community on earth that lets women choose whom or when to marry.

False!

Polyamory and the polygamous freedom to marry did make some advances this year; polyamory in the Canadian court decision and both in public opinion. But there's still a ways to go.

What we need is full marriage equality as part of a society that has gender equality under the law, domestic violence protections, protections for children, the freedom to not marry, and the freedom to (equal access to) divorce. A woman should be free to share love, sex, residence, and marriage with any consenting adults, including a with someone who is already married, even if that someone is a woman, even if that woman is her sister. If you don’t like it, then don’t do it. But let others have the relationships of their choosing.